The forgiveness work that I have to do is as follows:
1) I forgive myself for the perception and belief that “A” ever disrupted my world and interfered with my connection to love.
2) I forgive myself for ever pretending that “B” could take something away from me and/or that I needed “B”s companionship, agreement and ongoing affirmation.
3) I forgive myself for being a little shit, for pretending that somehow my aliveness had to be muted and that somehow I should have conformed with what I thought “C”s vision was of who I was supposed to be. I forgive myself for using “C” as an excuse to play small in my life.
4) I forgive myself for living my life as if I not only needed to prove myself to “D” but that I needed to exceed everything that “D” had achieved in life so that I could be “good enough.”
5) I forgive myself for continuing to tell the sad little story about how “E” hurt me and in doing so I have continued to hurt myself to a much greater extent than “E” ever possibly could have.
6) I forgive myself for telling myself the lie about how other people held the keys to my own kingdom. I forgive myself for telling myself that somebody else had what I needed.
7) I forgive myself for pretending that if I went my own way and lived authentically, vivaciously, outrageously as me then I would be at risk of losing my connection to those close to me. Which, ok, maybe I would have been but in the process I lost connection with myself anyway and, therefore, I really did not have that much to offer to anybody else. I forgive myself for pretending not to know that the most important thing for me to do and to be is the most real, vulnerable and powerful self that I can be.